To be honest I do not know why I keep soldiering on. I am not brave or strong but here I am. Still alive. Mostly alright, to be honest I don’t know what is keeping me here. I use to fight with myself, arguing that if I could just still have one reason, one goddamn reason for me to stay alive. To stay fighting these battles then I would continue on, unlike the end. But over the years, it’s been getting harder and harder to find that reason. I tried to use my friends as the main reason. I tried to guilt trip myself into thinking what would they think or what would they do, but that doesn’t tend to help when all your friends al